#Chester Author is nuts

I was 26,291 days old (72 years in Earth orbit terms) and went for a hike in Delamere Forest in Cheshire. I forgot to smile because…

…I am worried. It’s book three of the Flying Crooked series and it’s getting away with me. Characters are writing themselves and telling me to fuck off, make a cup of tea while they get on with plot, subplot, craziness, proving me right by being wrong and all that.

I was teaching in Chester’s Queen’s Park High in Handbridge when I wrote my first novel. While I enriched kids’ lives with my antics, field trips and tales of blood and fire (I taught Geography and they loved natural disasters) I found a piece of amber with a fossil seed in it. A kind of Extinction Rebellion group was able to grow the ancient plant, which was like bind weed. It was used to plant bomb nuclear silos in Russia and the US. Convolvulus. I sent it to publishers all over. A near miss, but I knew Michael Crichton had read it and critiqued it as a jobbing reader for a publisher. He wrote to me years later after Jurassic Park was published by him. Yes, I MIGHT have given him the idea but he improved on it to include dinosaurs. Fair enough.

On school days, I’d go home at night, mark books and prepare lessons then write stories. My humorous thriller, ESCAPING REALITY was published in 2001 but under a pseudonym John Ambit because of the bubble-wrap sex and other naughty bits.

I was convinced I was going nuts while teaching because my discipline was becoming awful. One day a class stood up halfway through a lesson and walked out. I thought, funny, they don’t usually do that. The last one said, Aren’t you coming, Sir, the fire alarms going? I wasn’t crazy, just 85% deaf. Happiness is when Cheshire County Council gives you 100% teacher’s ill-health retirement pension 5 years early and say, On yer bike, Nelder. So I did.

I wrote articles for cycling mags and blogs, but mainly wrote novels.

Another thriller, HOT AIR, is based on shooting down a hot air balloon. What? Yes. Most of it is set in Mallorca so a field trip during a heat wave. Wife not happy because she had to work and said my key mightn’t work when I get back.

EXIT, PURSUED BY A BEE (not bear as in the Winter’s Tale by Bill S) is a strange scifi novel. Alien artefacts are already here under the surface and they are leaving. Not like Apollo rockets but incredibly slowly. The army and scientists are baffled. There’s one under Glastonbury Tor and the top of the hill goes up too. Problem: as the spheres leave, time goes wrong on Earth. Time quake disasters. A Mars mission piloted by a feisty woman is diverted to chase after the aliens to persuade them to return and fix things. Great fun to write – especially the sex in space.

LEFT LUGGAGE again features the bindweed but another author doesn’t pinch it this time. Main premise is infectious amnesia. I was stunned that no one has written fiction with that before. Still haven’t. An alien case is opened. The virus means everyone nearby loses a year’s memory per week. No immunity. Disaster. Book two and three get madder. ARIA – Alien Retrograde Infectious Amnesia.

XAGHRA’S REVENGE came about on Gozo, a tiny, quiet and quaint island next to Malta. I discovered that in 1551 pirates abducted all 5,000 Gozitans. Sold as slaves in Libya and Turkey. Outrageous. Their souls demand revenge and I give it to them.

INCREMENTAL is my best collection of madness ever. 25 shorts of a mix of scifi, surreal, Kafkaesque (As prof Stanley Salmon of Chester writers called it) and more mental than incremental. A pothole doubles in size every day – how long before countries are swallowed? The Earth? Yet it doesn’t finish there… A man thought he had amnesia but is the imaginary friend of a girl… A noise heard the world over increases by a decibel every day… All of them great fun to research and write.

SUPPOSE WE is book one of the Flying Crooked series, a commissioned novella and first of three. LL-Publications asked me to bring passion back into scifi space exploration. The ship crashlands on a faraway planet. Sadly, the natives are intellectually, and physically so far ahead of Earth that they ignore the humans. Luckily the planet, Kepler 20-h has a problem and the solution is in the humans’ mission package – a secret known only the ship’s AI, which has gone a bit mad.Suppose-We-by-Geoff-Nelder-square

SUPPOSE WE is the name of the human’s spaceship. It was a temporary name but it stuck. The novella was released on May 20th 2019.

FALLING UP is the sequel to SUPPOSE WE. The title alone tells you that if you thought book one was a bit mad then book two is whacky yet great fun. On Falling Up from Peter Wilhelmsen, fantasy writer: “Your book is an awesome ride. The characters jump out of their pages and their personalities really shine through.”

Now we come to Son of Kepler, book three of the Flying Crooked series. It’s not been written, but it is dancing around in my head. When I start writing the characters surviving from FALLING UP push me out. It’s a struggle in my inner space. Watch this outer space.

Links to the books named above:

Escaping Reality – humorous thriller • http://hyperurl.co/nyjaiv

Hot Air – thriller set in Mallorca • http://hyperurl.co/di4y0h

Exit, Pursued by a Bee – scifi with timequakes • http://hyperurl.co/du4s3h

ARIA: Left Luggage – infectious amnesia scifi  • smarturl.it/1fexhs

ARIA: Returning Left Luggage • http://hyperurl.co/tgtid6

ARIA: Abandon Luggage • http://hyperurl.co/26trxv

Chaos of Mokii – scifi short  – a city exists in minds only • http://mybook.to/ChaosOM

Xaghra’s Revenge – Malta historical fantasy with pirates / slaves • http://myBook.to/Xaghra

Incremental – 25 surreal short stories • http://mybook.to/Incremental

Suppose We -science fiction space exploration • https://mybook.to/SupposeWe


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